Kerry Shook - Happiness Hoax
In April 2013, a fishing vessel was attacked off the coast of South Africa, killing everyone on board. A TV crew documented marine biologist Collin Drake as he worked to determine the predator responsible. His discovery is presented in shocking footage that points to a monster shark of over 60 feet in length. Now, I just read the description of Discovery Channel's documentary that kicked off "Shark Week 2013". The documentary was titled, "Megalodon: The Monster Shark Lives".
And the documentary showed that the prehistoric creature that went extinct ages ago had now returned to the ocean, and they showed video of a whale that had washed ashore that had this huge bite taken out of its side, and they measured the teeth marks and determined that it was the exact size of a megalodon's jaws. And they had scientists and shark researchers explaining why they believe the evidence proved the 60-foot shark was not extinct after all, and there were a few megalodons still terrorizing the deep ocean. There was just one problem with the documentary. It was all a hoax. It was all fake. Everyone in the documentary were actors, and all the evidence was just made up, and despite a brief disclaimer that it was fiction, many people thought the documentary was real.
The scientific community was furious at the Discovery Channel for confusing people instead of educating them about sharks. The network was bombarded with negative comments from irate viewers who felt they'd been lied to. They also felt that the network, who was all about education, had done it all for ratings. The big hoax created such a huge negative backlash, Discovery Channel has never again produced a fictional documentary for "Shark Week". But there's a much bigger and much more devastating hoax that so many of us have believed all of our lives without ever thinking to question it. It's the happiness hoax. And the lie goes something like this. I need to do whatever it takes to be happy.
The most important thing in my life is to be happy. My whole goal in life is to be happy. But happiness comes from the happenings around you, that is, if everything that's happening in my life is perfect, I'll be happy. If I can just get to the place where my circumstances are perfect, I'll be happy. The problem is our circumstances are never perfect, so we're never happy. In fact, if your goal in life is to be happy, it's guaranteed that you won't be, because happiness is a hoax. It's an illusion on this earth that we're always trying to grasp, but it's always just outside our reach. But like the megalodon, happiness used to exist when God created Adam and Eve, and he put them in this perfect place where all their circumstances were perfect, and they enjoyed total happiness in the garden of Eden, totally connected to God's love and connected to each other.
They were in this perfect paradise where their circumstances were perfect, but when they disobeyed God and sin entered the world, happiness became extinct. In our broken and very imperfect world, happiness will always just be out of reach, because our fallen world is far from perfect. Now, one day, happiness will be restored. If you're a Christ follower, you will enter into perfect happiness again in perfect heaven, the place of total fulfillment for all eternity. That's why we have this ache in our soul for happiness, and we still feel this faint echo of total happiness that emanates from the garden of Eden. I want us to see how we can break free from the happiness hoax, because if you fall for the happiness hoax, the sharks of discontentment start circling in your mind, and it quickly becomes a feeding frenzy of discontentment that eats away at your soul.
Now, as we conclude this series on shark-infested thinking, I want us to go back to the very first passage that we read that the whole series is based on, Romans 12:2. So, would you stand in honor of God's Word? Just follow along with me. "Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out". You can be seated. I want you to focus on that phrase, "Changed from the inside out".
See, joy comes from letting God change your heart and your mind, so you can discover a miracle no circumstance can steal, but the happiness hoax is all about changing from the outside in. We think, "If I can change what's happening on the outside of my life, I'll experience happiness within my life". But when you try to change from the outside in, it just creates a deep discontentment that keeps you striving for something that's always just out of your reach. And then you start blaming your circumstances for your unhappiness, or you start blaming other people for your unhappiness. It's my spouse's fault I'm not happy. It's my job's fault I'm not happy. It's my boss's fault I'm not happy. It's my church's fault. It's this financial problem that's keeping me from happiness.
So, we start trying to change our circumstances, because we think that it's from the outside in. So, we change jobs, houses, spouses, churches, cities. We bounce around from one thing to the next, thinking, this will make me happier. In fact, we've become what I call a pinball nation, just bouncing around from thing to thing, thinking, "Oh, this is it". And it's good for a while. You bounce from one thing to the next, and you think, "Yeah, this is amazing. This is just perfect. This will make me happy". But it never does, because there are always problems. It never does. Why? Because wherever you go, there you are.
You see, you take the problem with you, because the problem is you. It's not changed from the outside in, it's changed from the inside out. And that's what joy is all about. It's all about God giving you this gift that's from the inside that changes what's on the outside. But God wants us to play a part in it, because we can't experience joy without practicing certain things that break this happiness hoax. I want us to go back to Romans 12:2 again, the first part of it in the Message paraphrase. It says, "Don't become so well-adjusted to the culture that you fit into it without even thinking".
We start to conform to this culture of discontentment without even thinking about it. Folks, our culture is chasing this illusion of happiness full speed, and all it's left us with is a culture of discontentment, with a deep emptiness, always looking for the next thing, and the next thing, and the next thing, because happiness is just outside of our reach, but it looks like it's right in front of us, but it's just an illusion. It's a hoax. It's a big lie. I find it so interesting that little kids, I mean, it doesn't take much for them to be content. It doesn't take much for them to get really excited about something.
Our son, Josh, and his wife, Kelly, are fostering a little boy, and he just turned one. We had this big birthday party, gave him all of his presents, but what he loved the most was the wrapping, you know. That made him happy, you know, all the wrapping. That was just joyful to him. I've seen him play with a muffin tin for about 30 minutes, just banging it on the floor, filled with joy. I mean, that's the way it is with little kids. You know, it just doesn't take much to fill them with joy. They get so excited about these little things, and because it's before the peer pressure of our culture starts to mold them in to this culture of discontentment, where it's like, "Oh, I need that, what they have. I need what they have. I need to wear those clothes. I need to drive that car. I need to do this".
And so, and if we do find, quote, "happiness," it's not really happiness. It's just trash compared to the treasure of the things that are the most important, things like joy, that change everything, that circumstances can never steal. I want you to look at Philippians 4:11-13, because the Apostle Paul wrote this from prison. He was in the Mamertine prison in Rome. And Chris and I have been there several times, and this prison, the ruins of it, it's just dark and damp, and really the ruins are about what it was, because it was very small, and a cramped place, and Paul writes the book of Philippians from this prison, and it's pretty amazing, because Philippians is known as the book of joy, the most joyful book in the Bible, and it's all about how to experience this amazing gift of joy, and he writes it from prison.
I'm going, how in the world? Because joy has nothing to do with your circumstances. How do you have that kind of joy in that situation? And he tells us that it starts with contentment. "For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me". Paul says, "I've learned the secret of contentment, because contentment is something that you've got to learn. It doesn't come naturally for me".
Naturally, you and I are discontent. In this world that's fallen, we move toward discontentment, thinking that we need something else, because we fall for the happiness hoax. So, we've gotta learn contentment. Now, I really want to point out that Philippians 4:13 is a passage and a promise we quote all the time. "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me". And what a powerful promise. And we claim it for a lot of different things, and it's great, but we don't usually read the first two verses that come before it, or we don't even know those first two verses.
So, we don't know the specific thing that it's talking about, but Paul is saying here, "I can even learn contentment through the power of Christ, who strengthens me". He's saying, "I need Christ's power to learn contentment, because it doesn't come naturally for me, but it's supernatural". And once you discover it, once you learn it, everything changes in your life, because you're no longer dependent upon the happiness hoax to keep you going and to leave you empty. You experience something from within that changes, but it all starts in the mind, with God changing the way you think, so he can fill you up with his gift from your heart, that changes what's going on, on the outside of your life.
And so we're going to talk about this contentment today, but we do need God's power to learn it. But any time you learn something, you've gotta practice it, right? If you want to learn a new musical instrument, you've gotta practice it and practice it. You gonna learn a new language, you've gotta practice it. If you want to learn how to play a new sport, golf or tennis, you've gotta practice and practice. And so if you want to learn something, you've gotta practice it. And when you want to learn contentment, you've gotta practice it. There's no other way. And you need God's power to practice it, because it goes against our nature and our flesh, but it's supernatural.
When you start practicing it, whether you feel like it or not, God begins to take over, and it changes the way you feel, and you experience this supernatural gift. So, how do I practice it? There are three things I've gotta do to practice contentment. First, I've gotta practice connection, because disconnection is at the root of all discontentment. You were made for connection. You were made for deep connection with God and with people in your life. That's what you were made for. That's why we can do all these other things and achieve all these amazing things. We can acquire, we can succeed, but it will always leave you empty, because you were made for deep connection. But instead of building close relationships that fill the emptiness in our life, instead of connection, we usually compare.
Instead of connecting with people in a deep, rich way, we usually compare ourselves with other people, and it leaves us in this place of discontentment. In 2 Corinthians 10:12, it says, "We do not dare classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise". He's saying it's foolish to compare yourself with anyone else, because it only leads to discontentment. We start comparing houses, and cars, and jobs, and looks, and clothes, and the sharks of discontentment have a feeding frenzy, and it eats away at our soul, and it steals our joy. How do you react when someone you know gets a nicer car than you? How do you react when someone you know gets a nicer house than you have? How do you react when someone you know gets a blessing that you don't have?
Well, if you're a Christ follower, you go, "Wow, I'm really happy for you, that you got that nice house. That's exciting. Praise God. He's blessing you. Wow, I'm really happy for you as a Christ follower. I rejoice with you, and I wonder why God hasn't blessed me like that. But, oh, I'm so thankful for what he's done for you. Don't get me wrong". I mean, that's what we're thinking, right? We're trying to be excited, but do you think right off the bat, "Man, I wish I had that"? "You know, wow. God, why did you bless them with that? You haven't blessed me with it". And we start comparing ourselves, and it makes us dissatisfied with what God has given us, and it keeps us from receiving the good things that God wants to bring us.
One of the greatest lessons you'll ever learn in life is learning to admire without having to acquire. If the only time you celebrate when something good happens is when it happens to you, you're going to miss out on a lot of celebrations. You see, I don't have to have the blessing for me to celebrate someone else's blessing and to enjoy it. You see, I don't have to own everything to enjoy it. You can enjoy when God blesses someone else. And the reason why we struggle with enjoying it when God blesses someone else and celebrating the blessings of others is because we believe that God's goodness is unlimited, that there's not enough of God's goodness to go around.
And if God is good to them, then it's taking away from the goodness God could give me. And nothing could be further from the truth. That's a lie from the enemy. God has enough goodness to go around. And if you start looking at their goodness and wish you had that, then you're going to miss out on the goodness that's on the way for you. You're going to be so distracted, you won't be able to see it and receive it. God has good things in store for you, and his goodness is unlimited. And so we don't have to compare. We can celebrate. I want you to look at Ecclesiastes 1:9, because it talks about the shark of never enough. Everything is wearisome beyond description. No matter how much we see, we're never satisfied. No matter how much we hear, we are not content.
Now, this was written by King Solomon, one of the wealthiest people to ever live. This was back when a buck was a buck, before all this inflation. I mean, King Solomon was very wealthy. And what is he doing here? He's giving us the answer to the question, "How much money does it take to be happy"? Just a little bit more, just a little bit more. The shark of never enough is swimming in our minds, and it comes from our culture, "just a little bit more". In fact, they've done survey after survey, and they ask people what they're currently making, what their salary is, and then they ask them, "How much would it take to be happy"? And it's always just a little bit more. It's like, "Well, this is great, but if I just had a little bit more, you know, it wouldn't be so tight. With a little bit more, we could do this or do that, just a little more".
And then when those same people make more, they ask them the same question, "How much does it take to be happy"? "Well, it's just a little bit more". I mean, this is a little difficult. We really need to do this. And everyone says, "Just a little bit more, just a little bit more". And it's the greatest lie. It's the happiness hoax, "If I get to this place, then I'll be happy". And that happiness never comes. Why is it that so many people today are so dissatisfied and unfulfilled? It's because they're looking in the wrong place. First, they're looking for happiness that doesn't exist, and they'll never find joy in pleasure, in achievements, in possessions.
Never gonna find it there, because we were created with a spiritual hunger for deep connection with God and with others, and until you practice connection, there will always be an emptiness in your soul, a gnawing in your soul that there's got to be something more, because you're looking in the wrong place. Nothing wrong with possessions, or pleasure, or achievement. There's nothing wrong with that at all. It's just that it'll never bring happiness. And there's nothing wrong with the desire to acquire. God put that in you. It's just when you focus on that, and that becomes your focus in life to find happiness through your possessions, or through pleasure, or through your success, or your achievements, then it begins to control you. Your possessions possess you, and you'll never find contentment that God has for you.
Mother Teresa used to say, "In India, they're starving physically, but in America, they're starving emotionally". And it's so true, because there's a big difference between being filled and satisfied. You can have a schedule that's filled with all kinds of, quote, "important" activities and important meetings, and be totally dissatisfied with your life, because you're empty on the inside. You can live a life filled with pleasure, but be totally unfulfilled. So, first, I've gotta practice connection, and then secondly practice gratitude, practice gratitude. In Ecclesiastes 5:19, it says, "If God gives us wealth and property and lets us enjoy them, we should be grateful and enjoy what we have worked for. It is a gift from God".
God says, "Everything you have is a gift from me, and I want you to enjoy it and be grateful for it". But there's something in human nature that we focus on the one negative. If I had a huge canvas up here today that went all the way to the ceiling, all the way across the front here, and it was all white, but it had one red circle in the middle, one big red dot, what would you focus on? The big red dot. And some of you have all these blessings in your life that God has brought you, but you just focus on the one problem, the one thing. And God says, "Start practicing gratitude instead of grumbling".
And it's a practice. You've gotta practice. Start looking for the goodness and thank God for it, because every gift is from God, but we're always looking for the next thing to make us happy. We think, "If I get blank, then I'll be happy". And just fill in the blank. "If I get blank, then I'll be happy. If I get through this stressful season, then I'll be happy. If I get through this problem, then I'll be happy. If I get through this circumstance, then I'll be happy". "When this happens, I'll be happy". "When I get married, then I'll be happy". "You know, when I get through this problem, then I'll be happy".
It's always the "when and then thinking". Never wait to celebrate. You need to celebrate the things that God has given you, because joy is not getting whatever you want. Joy is learning to enjoy whatever you have. Start thanking God today. We're going to give you practical ways to start thanking God, to change your focus, and it changes your mindset. And when God changes your mind, he changes your heart, and it starts coming out in your life, and you live with an attitude of gratitude, and it changes people around you.
Well, the first thing that I've gotta do is practice connection. Then I've gotta practice gratitude, and then I've gotta practice giving. You can't break free from the happiness hoax and find fulfillment without practicing giving and making it a habit. In 1 Timothy 6:17, it says, "Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant, not to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life".
Now, who is he speaking to? He says, "Command those who are rich". It's a command. Well, he's speaking to all of us. You say, "Kerry, I'm not rich". Yes, you are, if you live in America. Even if you're on welfare, you're like in the top 10% of the world, because half the world lives on less than $10 a day. And so we're all rich, but it's not a problem, God says, as long as you do these things that are mentioned in this passage. See, is it possible to be wealthy and not materialistic? Yes. I mean, you can be greedy and poor or greedy and rich. You can be poor and content or wealthy and content.
Materialism is an attitude. There's enough of God's goodness to go around, and I'll give, and I'll be generous and be filled with joy if I believe God's goodness is unlimited, because God can give me back more than I give, like he promises. And God can bless someone else with a different blessing than he blesses me with, and I can rejoice about that, because he's gonna bless me more. You know, there's enough of his goodness to go around. I'm gonna celebrate when others get blessed, because God's been so good, and I'm gonna be grateful, and I know God's goodness hasn't run out, and I'm gonna celebrate that and be filled with joy.